I always prayed that she would change her ways. From moving place to place motel to motel I grew so much hate towards my mom. Father was never around left me and one of my brothers when we were babies. As I got older the less love I got from my mom. I'm the youngest of 4 was filled with so much happiness as a kid. Mother is a druggie, basically my whole family is. I Love her but I really do consider running away as an option. I cry at night because of this but she just says to everyone 'She's sulking because she can't get the stuff she wants' and then her friends scold me and tease me while she sits and laughs. I also cut myself but Mum and my mum just says 'good job!' Because she doesn't pay attention. (It rained overnight as well) I feel for you. His mum broke up with her boyfriend and they moved house but it was almost a year ago and she still says 'He's being a very good boy!' And scolds me when I tell her all the bad stuff he does which happens all the time. She just says 'He's going through a really hard time'. Sometimes her friends son comes over to sleep and she admitted that she loved him more than she loved me. You can spend it on some lunch tomorrow'. But then she looks at my older brother and says 'Dear, I just put $10 in your account. When she gave me a hand-me-down phone, which I'm very grateful for, I used it for homework and my brother used his for pure YouTube videos, she looks at me in disgust and says 'You f*cking idiot! Get off your phone and socialize with your family!' And she snatches my phone off me and continues FBing (face booking) with her friends. She just sits in the same corner of the couch and stays on her phone. Whenever I come home from school covered in bruises (thanks to bullies) my mum doesn't notice. Tears and pain was never enough to watch someone I love with my life walk away from me without saying "goodbye". As funny as it appeared to my eyes I confronted her and heard her say to me to my very face that "we were not meant to be". One black Tuesday morning, I saw an sms from this lady-telling me that she is in love with another lover. She made my life so beautiful in many ways that sometimes I would ask myself what life would have been without her?. To me that young lady was everything I ever lived for, no words in the world has ever described how precious she was to me. Quite amazing that words described how precious I was to her. She called me amazing, she said I am her amazing grace sent from the messiah to be at her mercy. Three years ago I was in love with a young lady of about my age and we were so fond of each other. The amazing part of it is when you are in love and your sense of judgement is battered. Life is beautiful when there is a purpose why you live or who you live for. No one in this family cares for the thoughts running through my head nor the tears running down my cheeks.Īll we can do is keep going forward I suppose and hope that life is better in the years to come once the storm is over. Shouldn't parents be there for us when we cry? Shouldn't they also hold us close and actually tell us things will be okay when we're torn down? I myself am not very sure anymore as all that is shown to me is emotional neglect. So I completely understand and relate to this poem. My little sister is the one that gets almost all of the love while I am shown I'm a disgrace and once I actually try to speak to them about it, I'm told I'm a "drama starter". Now it's evident my parents have given up caring yet, they claim to say those same three words, "I love you." In middle school, and freshman year, they cared. I am a senior in high school and I have seen this poem become more and more of a reality in my life as the years have passed. Instead, I learned the words "I love you" are meaningless. I needed you to tell me how much you loved me. Instead, I locked myself in my room in complete despair. Instead, I held my pillow tight while never-ending tears streamed down my face. When I would cry myself to sleep at night, Instead, I hid my scars and became oblivious to everyone. I needed you to stop me and tell me how important I was. When I would inflict self-torture, wanting to die, I needed you to come running with you healing ways. Instead, I grew up alone with no one to turn to. I needed you to hold me tight and never let me go. When I felt so lonely and needed someone to care, Instead, I kept it all bottled up inside. Instead, I experienced what the word "friendless" really meant. I needed you to be that only friend I had left. When I lost all my friends and had no one, Instead, I endured all the cruel words and criticism the world threw at me. I needed you to be the one to defend me and be on my side. When everyone was attacking me and putting me down, making me feel so low, Instead, I drank till I was numb enough not to feel anything.
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